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  1. #21
    Member Uncle Walker's Avatar
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    I live by a schedule most of my time is mapped out on a weekly basis so doing this will kind of be a challenge as it represents time that is not planned productively. But there is NO DOUBT in my mind that this idea of negative thought patterns happens. I am in hobbies that guys love to do but if you get things planned to far in advance without a super strong system to keep them committed, they flake. Shit like, "Sorry man its my wife's mothers birthday that weekend."

    So I can see value in the system however I can also see txting chicks many times when it just doesn't lead anywhere.
    Do you spend a lot of time doing this?
    Do you "fish" by sending a similar message to five different girls at the same time to see if one will bite?
    I can see where sending later at night would work better. when they are in down time, however, I sleep then. If I send txts at 11:00 I will probably be asleep before they reply. Do you think it will work other times?
    The real problem I foresee is that whenever I try to just meetup with chicks off txting like this I find she is busy, she doesn't reply, we could have a long interaction that goes nowhere. . .. . I don't see how you get around that?

    Can you give us a better idea of the subject matter or vibe or tone, not sure exactly what to call it that you use in your meesaging. I get that you don't hint but that is what you don't do, what is it that you DO?

  2. #22
    Member Patterns's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ijjjji View Post
    -

    Part 1 - Why Plans Result in Cold Feet.


    The inherent problem with planned events, is that during the period leading up to the event, there will be 'low' periods where future events are seen in a 'negative light' of worry or lack of enthusiasm. (Just think about a time when you were feeling worried, tired or just bored.) During such times, negative thoughts and worries tend to ACCUMULATE in regard to upcoming events. With longer time span, more such 'lows' will occur, potentially allowing multiple layers of negativity to accumulate. End result is often total loss of interest or even AVERSION.

    In short, planning in advance will make any previous doubts FESTER & AMPLIFY, resulting in COLD FEET.

    Conclusion: NEVER plan a first meet-up in advance.

    ...
    ijjjji this post is golden. You have a way of explaining things (in this post and others) which describes what should be done (and not done) clearly, giving the internal reasons for it which are exactly right on. And just enough. Not too little, but not too much. All and only.

  3. #23
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    This post has been ranked 10.00 out of 10 with 1 votes.

    Qlue, yes 2nd method is better for girls you didnt spend time with yet. No, avoid scheduling. Yes naturals do this alot.

    - -
    Stiletto, you have a point (2,3). I guess reason night call still works amazing, is party mood + alcohol.. (And maybe girl starts to worry that you find another girl if she dont meet up with you. After all, she has seen you in action already if you met her from night game!) At least my experience is that girls will meet up 100% if they are in vicinity of where you are calling from. (Becoming attractive is obvious, so I never mention that in posts about other things!)

    - -
    Uncle Walker, I live by method 1 now. I used to live by method 2. I stated clearly in OP that it requires a lot more effort! I found that I always got the meet though. BUT, those were girls that I had met during night game and spent an hour or more with. I can not say what success % you would get if using this on daygame girls you only talked to for 10min. So you may have a point.

    Im rusty on method 2, text stuff was typically playful flirting:
    -calling them funny names
    -comparing them to animals
    -various mini cold reads
    -busting their balls for something they said/did/insinuated

    (A very versatile tool for text game, is to make a hilarious far fetched interpretation of insinuations in her previous text, then bust her for that.)

    - -
    Patterns stop, you are making me blush Yea explanations/understanding should be kept at a minimum. They tend to undermine techniques by making them less 'organic'. (Less chaos energy!)

  4. #24
    Member Tank_'s Avatar
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    My experience is generally in agreement here. I've had most success getting meets when I banter and flirt until she suggests a meet. Ideally she even asks a variation of "so when are we meeting?"

    Sometimes, though, the banter fizzles, i.e. I just can't think of any more flirty txts to send, there's no more callback humor to hit, and so then I just pitch a meet right there. Generally, and this is especially the hotter the girl is, she does respond in a flakey way (or not at all).
    But some still do respond and meet up.

    So in general the best I've found is to keep bantering until she hints, but 2nd best if the banter loses steam before she starts biting is that trying is still better than giving up.

  5. #25
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    Bump due to re-emergence of misguided threads on subject.
    Loves: Shy Girl-coding into Starry-eyed Extroversion, spamming Open-loops and Mini-cold-reads and lots of light kino.
    Hates: Putting pressure on others. Things that feel 'brainy'.

  6. #26
    Gentleman Player Tarzan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ijjjji View Post
    -[B](This method is much more effort, because sometimes you have to tease girls for days before they 'crack' like this. But it always happens sooner or later in my experience!)
    This is really interesting!

    It explains why girls' favorite way of dropping out is abruptly stopping all communication. Any further communication is an invitation for you to keep gaming her, which can result in her meeting you due to a spike of emotions, if you press the right emotional button and/or when she is randomly receptive to that.

    In other words, dropping all communication is sometimes a logical countermeasure to avoid accidentally hooking up with a guy who was logically judged undesirable. They do that because they don't trust their own emotions not to lead them astray, especially confronted with a guy who is a sexual threat. It's the equivalent of telling her female friends to cockblock for her because she's really horny tonight, or deleting an ex's number from her phone so she won't booty-call in a moment of weakness.

    'Good' (popular) guys report that they never have problems when planning a meeting. (Since the girl had NO DOUBT to begin with.)
    I don't consider myself "good", and certainly not "popular", but I do advise a different strategy of scheduling: qualify her hard and blatantly, i.e. make her jump through a bunch of hoops to prove compliance, and even then - set the meet where logistics are heavily tilted in your favor, e.g. the coffee shop across the street, so her potential flaking will affect you minimally (this by itself is yet another hoop for her to jump through).

    I've tried longer text exchanges before settling on this method, and that never worked for me. When I first read your post, I thought "this is a cool idea, I bet it works really well with Ij's style... But definitely hasn't worked for me!".

    Thinking about it more, though, I wasn't doing it quite the same way back when I unsuccessfully tried it. I was chasing them for a meet over multiple texts, and they would always postpone and reschedule and "have plans" at the last minute, ad infinitum.

    Yet what I was doing was actually the opposite of what you are suggesting: instead of bantering and flirting until SHE suggests the meet, I was constantly chasing the meet in a very serious (and somewhat needy) manner.

    Maybe I should try your "fast way" for a bit.

    I have tried your "effortless way" back when I just started, and it generally never worked for me. I remember several instances of getting a girl's number during the day with some tentative plans to meet later that night if I end up going to X, then I'd text her "hey, I'm at X, are you around?" and not get a response. Like most "effortless" techniques, it works when the girl is very much into you, and I didn't have much of that at the beginning. Once I start getting a new stream of results, I'll probably try it again.

    All that said, my own, very different approach does get me a ton of dates. Especially recently, getting dates and to an extent even makeouts has basically become a non-issue for me. If I laid just 10% of the girls I date, or 20% of the girls I made out with on the first date, I'd be among the most successful players on this board.

    schedule 10 girls from online on the same day, and hope that 1 or 2 dont flake.
    Are online flaking rates really above 80-90%, even for good players? That's insane. I had no idea that solid guys out there are dealing with this kind of flaking rate for ANY type of game.

    Be warned though: the reduction of interest still plays a role, so the girl could be lukewarm when you meet her, leaving you with more 'uphill struggle', compared to a spontaneous meeting..)
    That has only happened to me in very few cases.

  7. #27
    ThePoolPlayer
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    I really like number 2. Just texting a girl until she brings it up. It seems like if I bring it up then it doens't work. Thanks Ijjjji.

  8. #28

  9. #29
    Member Galaxy's Avatar
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    For sedfast this is hall of fame. Why plan a date frame when you can just spontaneously text her when she's at her horniest?

    ill continue to test this out although pitching meetings doesn't give too many flakes if the pressure is low so make the pitch extremely low pressure
    THREAD Illuminatus' male episodic memory versus female emotional memory is a great reminder about the premise that women love their feelings and if you associate yourself with these feelings you're in, at least in that particular moment.

  10. #30
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    Since no 'edit', ill just add this note for inclusion in a future version of this method:

    Quote Originally Posted by ijjjji View Post
    DONT!

    That 'final reply' is such a needy thing to do! After I stopped doing that, girls have become far more likely to be the ones asking me out the next time! So, no 'intro txt' and no replying afterwards. One message only.

    (I usually send the text to upwards of 5 girls when I inform that Im available for a meet... and I suspect that girls _understand_ this situation, when I dont waste time with useless texts.)

    I was sure I had emphasized this in the '100% Meet Method', but turns out I forgot to mention
    Edit: quick reply to Tiisky bellow; txt is always read between the lines. And girls always 'get' the message loud and clear ime, as in: " Im at X! You out?" actually means "You turn me on. Im at X, where are you? Do you want to come over, or should I come to where you are?"

    If you feel the need to emphasize that you are a bit eager/needy to meet her (e.g. if girl is very low self esteem), feel free to include those things in the actual text. (Similar effect to the 'extra reply' after she declines..)

    If you are still unsure, let me assure you, I only get 3 types of replies:
    -"Im coming nooow dont go anywhere!"
    -"Im at Y. COME HERE NOW! Its great!"
    -nothing (followed maybe by a text next morning depending on politeness-type of girl.)
    Last edited by ijjjji; 11-03-2014 at 06:05 AM.
    Loves: Shy Girl-coding into Starry-eyed Extroversion, spamming Open-loops and Mini-cold-reads and lots of light kino.
    Hates: Putting pressure on others. Things that feel 'brainy'.

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