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Thread: Logical date

  1. #1

    Logical date

    How will you keep a date conversation not logical? This is a tough challenge as i was trying to build rapport.

    I had date today. Started year strong. However the conversation turned to a logical conversation.
    In the end she gave me a dumb as fk handshake. I doubt she is interested lol

    We had a date for 2 hours. Coffee and walk in the mall.

  2. #2
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2012

    Thats why dates suck to begin with. No guarantees, but the common methods to fix it are:
    -Sitting next to girl (shoulder-shoulder)
    -Emotionally charged remarks/compliments with light kino
    -Teasing the girl
    Loves: Shy Girl-coding into Starry-eyed Extroversion, spamming Open-loops and Mini-cold-reads and lots of light kino.
    Hates: Putting pressure on others. Things that feel 'brainy'.

  3. #3

    This post has been ranked 10.00 out of 10 with 1 votes.

    There are some people with which you simply won't connect very well. Keep in mind that in any conversation between two people those two people will share the responsibility for it to be one they both can enjoy. If you're talking to someone who doesn't care to make the conversation interesting, well..

    Anyway, there are some principles you could use if you're into that stuff:

    - Successfully convincing yourself that anyone you'll ever meet has at least one interesting thing you can learn from them. I used to be that way when I was about 20, I was opening up anyone I met on the streets, on the tram, busses, wherever, being truly curious what I could learn from them and how they would brighten my day with their stories. A few years later I stopped doing that because a) I was very depressed after the relationship with someone I truly loved broke down, b) I realized that I'm forcing these things even when I'm not into talking and c) I was basically providing all the energy and structure for each conversation while my other conversation partner wouldn't, which became rather exhausting after a while. A few years later I wondered why people had become less interesting and why I had encountered so many interesting people back in the days, until I realized that people are still interesting, I'm just not asking them to be anymore so they seem dull. It's mostly a self-fulfilling prophecy thing, really: if you're not expecting much, you won't be getting much. Same is true for my students as a teacher, when they realized I believed in them for real, they would blossom beautifully.

    If you want to have an interesting conversation, direct your efforts at digging up the interesting parts of your conversation partner. Mind that what is interesting to you isn't known to the other one so he'll have a hard time chosing what to tell you to make it interesting, which is why sometimes it's nice to share some of your stuff so your conversation partner will have an idea about what could interest you.

    Using open questions related to feelings is usually also a good idea, as long as you're truly interested, like "How did you decide on following that career choice?". Only ask if you're truly interested on the answer, otherwise the conversation will feel very weird to the other one. Ask questions that will best be answered in story form, after you get your conversation partner to tell at least a short story, you'll usually have enough clues to ask further questions that can expand the story. Follow your curiosity and invite who you talk to on a journey through their lives following your questions.

    Finally, if you don't feel like contributing a lot, just don't. Silence is a powerful tool in your conversation arsenal if you use it correctly and don't freak out yourself. Just look at your conversation partner silently, spiced with a little curiosity while radiating acceptance towards her. You'll usually get a lot of reactions you can then comment on or (even better) ask new story-seeking questions.

    Over the years I've developed a habit of not talking too much to people but being very observant and if I feel like it I will start a conversation with someone which will usually go very deep quickly. In the beginning I have often wondered if people wouldn't see me as weird if I never talked to many people at social gatherings, but I've found that by not being at the center of attention and being somewhat selective in who I chose to talk with and also how long (if I don't want to talk anymore, I don't care much about social norms or politeness, I'll just leave the conversation), my conversation time usually seems to have a lot of value to people and they actively seek me out a lot of times. But I do have a rather unique personality.

    By the way, it's been years since I've been on a "date" and I wouldn't want to do it anymore. It kind of sets societal rules on how it should proceed, and I don't like rules that will usually result in predictable outcomes (like your way too logical conversation).

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  4. #4
    Member Qlue's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    World traveler

    This post has been ranked 1.00 out of 10 with 1 votes.

    Dates are just another word for interviews, and it's what women use to interview you in order to see what resources they can extract out of you.

    All you really need is an hour of time, isolated alone with a woman, anywhere where there is privacy and plausible deniability, then you kino/escalate as a form of screening, if she remains submissive move her to a sex location.

    If she rejects then it could mean one of two things:

    - You lack empathy and are not aware of her emotional state
    - She's not attracted to you and just wants to extract resources out of you (time, money, energy, attention, emotions, therapy, etc..)

    If it's the former, then you need to figure out PACING and improve your facial expression recognition
    If it's the latter, then you have successfully screened out a time waster.
    The Qlue, simple perspectives on life.

  5. #5
    Member bazoom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Western Europe

    This post has been ranked 10.00 out of 10 with 4 votes.

    1) post reports so we can help out better
    2) proximity and kino like ijjji said
    3) be able to flow from subject to subject (pick the positive parts from her talking/reframe it in a positive more emotional way
    4) qualify her for what you want in a woman (cool traits - look up razorjack archive)
    5) learn to talk in emotional stimulating ways (riker nlp course)
    6) learn sexual state projection (gunwitch)/seductive listening (60yearsofchallenge)
    7) learn to ask the right questions (engaging her imagery or sthing)

    So many options! But yeah you didnt specify so I wont either yet in general topic switching i find important

  6. #6

    Guys, thanks for the inputs. It's helping and it motivates me to go out and get more dates.

    One time a friend of mine told me PU only works on tourists, new girls to the country, and girls with mental issues. I had a feeling he was right but I never confirmed this until today.

    Had another date today:
    I was walking at the supermarket aisle and I saw a cute girl (7.5/10 in my scale) but I didn't want to use the classic opener "I saw you from over there and thought you were cute....blah blah blah", instead I opened with "Hey, Happy New Year" and to my surprise she is receptive and she starts to giggle lol. I can't really remember everything what I talked about, but I used a little bit of Bacchus' stuffs. "I can't believe is already 2017..."

    We talked for 2-3 minutes and we moved to Starbucks. It was very suspicious she wanted to come to Starbucks so quickly. (I don't think it's instant attraction)
    Got a drink, and we sat next to each other.
    She told me she has social anxiety, eczema, and she is very curious.

    During the conversation I think there was good eye contact, light touching, good conversation, and not as boring as Sunday's date, but it was still a little logical. Looks like I cannot get away from the logical conversation yet.
    After 35 minutes of conversation, she suggested to walked around the mall. She looks at her cell phone and she has a missed call from her sister, she calls her sister and after she finishes the call she had to go. She asked for my contact and I give it to her. I got home and texted her and she replied. I have a feeling she has ADHD or some kind of disorder. We will see what happens.

  7. #7

    Another date:
    I saw her at the yogurt section, she look fine from behind. But face wise not so good. (6/10 in my scale). I said "Hi, how are you". She smiled and said 'hi' back and started a conversation from there. Talked about 2016 and 2017.

    Told her to go to Starbucks to sit and chat more, she says she had to finish her grocery shopping. I took her hand and show her the way. She insisted to finish shopping and I said I will wait for her outside. She finished paying and we head to Starbucks.

    We sit next to each other. This time I was being less logical, light touches, eye contact. By some point I got turned off, I think she was just a 6 and was not attractive enough. Talked for 45 minutes. She sees the time and says she has to go. We exchanged number and I say to her to meet on Saturday, she says to text her. I left.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2015

    How much did you wait for her? If that was longer than 15 minutes that may have indicated that you're desperate.

  9. #9
    Member Kit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2015

    Quote Originally Posted by Trestristestigres View Post
    How will you keep a date conversation not logical? This is a tough challenge as i was trying to build rapport.

    I had date today. Started year strong. However the conversation turned to a logical conversation.
    In the end she gave me a dumb as fk handshake. I doubt she is interested lol

    We had a date for 2 hours. Coffee and walk in the mall.
    well there is this thing about bodylanguage... your conversation can be crazily logical, but if you both make your bodylanguage engage it won't really matter

  10. #10

    Quote Originally Posted by sch View Post
    How much did you wait for her? If that was longer than 15 minutes that may have indicated that you're desperate.
    I waited for 5 minutes.
    Its ok. I have dates every week anyway.

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