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  1. #11
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    Lately, Im getting strong feedback suggesting that sitting down is very strong success-factor for me! When I sit down, I dont even have to try. Girls will talk to me and ask me to dance etc, if I dont talk to them first.

    My guess is that there is a lot of interest in me that Im not aware of, but it only manifests when I sit down.. maybe girls find it much safer to talk to a stationary/seated man.

    QT: try ignoring the hottest girl at your table while flirting hard with rest of girls!! Notice reaction (attraction) you get when you talk to her later on!

  2. #12
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    OK, figured! Awareness bubble (lack of) is key to female attention when sitting.

    Im guessing that the 'mixed signal' of
    a) sitting down with her
    b) awareness elsewhere
    is what pulls girls in so strongly when I sit at a table.. Note: Where I sit, is extremely important. E.g. if I sit in a corner, my awareness is LOCKED towards the table (or study wall), so generally avoid wall/corner. Also, chair can spin, so better than couch.

  3. #13



    Sounds like there are some similarities in action to what you wrote below, don't you think?

    Quote Originally Posted by ijjjji View Post
    "Quick analogy - ever tried really hard to fall asleep? Doesnt work right! However, if you close your eyes and decide to drift only near the sleep zone, while meditating over something, you will very soon be irresistibly pulled into the sleep zone. Action, is very similar to sleep in this regard!"

  4. #14
    Member thecostofsuccess's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ijjjji View Post
    OK, figured! Awareness bubble (lack of) is key to female attention when sitting.

    Im guessing that the 'mixed signal' of
    a) sitting down with her
    b) awareness elsewhere
    is what pulls girls in so strongly when I sit at a table.. Note: Where I sit, is extremely important. E.g. if I sit in a corner, my awareness is LOCKED towards the table (or study wall), so generally avoid wall/corner. Also, chair can spin, so better than couch.
    Exactly, they EXPECT you to be nervous OR hit on them. It fakes them out.

    If you show awareness her timer starts for "he didn't make a move and now I'm uninterested", when you don't notice she can't start the timer, which makes anything you DO do spontaneous/interesting. It coils you like a ready spring, and girls like that.

  5. #15
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    Salaam, I see your point. Just like us, girls are motivated by their 'animal core', which is more easily moved when 'peripheral lingering' is the alternative to motion. Let me bring up cats at this time! Trying gently to push a cat in one direction, makes the cat lean/move the opposite way.. I guess that makes the pushing hand analogous to the edge of the 'bubble' the girl is excluded from... Thanks for bringing this link up!!

    Cozy, as usual you hit the nail on head! Your word 'EXPECT' is the key. (Ref the 'missing high C' in the vacuum story in theory board.....)

  6. #16
    Member Tech's Avatar
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    Reply to OP:

    I do this fairly irregularly. Woman like the boldness of just "joining" them, seem to be fairly accommodating, but men seem to get quite upset and defensive as if their "territory" is being threatened. I do try to befriend the guys, but once I start flirting with the women they make it pretty clear they want me to leave.

    Edit: Actually I remember one guy actually say "dude, your starting to annoy the fuck out of me." I'm not easily intimidated, but to keep things cool I did politely thank them for the chat and moved on. The girls were bitching at the guy for being so rude, but no woman is worth getting physical over.

    Edit2: I've done this in daygame, not in a club which has a way different vibe.

    The male/male tension could easily get out of hand. How do you handle such things? Am I overstaying my welcome? When I have plopped down at a table, it's rarely more than 10-15 minutes before I move on.



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  7. #17
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tech View Post
    The male/male tension could easily get out of hand.
    Sounds like you are elbowing into 'closed' sitting groups. I could never do that. If I want to join such table, I flirt with one of the girls there until she begs me to sit down.

  8. #18
    Member Tech's Avatar
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    Sounds like you are elbowing into 'closed' sitting groups.
    Oh definitely. I don't wait for the invitation. I'll hover a bit near an open chair, say the normal hi, how's it going. And if they respond favorably I plop down in the chair and make some introductions.



    - Tech

  9. #19
    Member ijjjji's Avatar
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    Yea had a polarized event this weekend that clarified the difference between what I and others do. Facing wrong way or not looking at girls is certainly key to the whole thing. Which means it doesnt work everywhere. (I suspect. Gonna have to test it on some more 'closed' tables and see.)

  10. #20
    Member thecostofsuccess's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ijjjji View Post
    Yea had a polarized event this weekend that clarified the difference between what I and others do. Facing wrong way or not looking at girls is certainly key to the whole thing. Which means it doesnt work everywhere. (I suspect. Gonna have to test it on some more 'closed' tables and see.)
    You just have to be confident enough that they BUY that its genuine and not some really weird thing.
    A few weeks ago a girl said "this is a private party area" to me, truth was I just responded with "ah, ok, I see your point, I can move if it bothers you guys". The fact is that this stuff happens incidentally all the time and is very similar to the "accidental bump", where it stirs an excuse for conversation after the initial accident.

    I've done this more brazenly too, where I just walk up, and sit down (think a girl thats huffing and puffing then planting herself down), girls then think of it like "oooh this is interesting, I wonder what he's thinking about". I've done it more comfortably as well, where there are seats everywhere but I sit next to her (just because I was in a good mood and I knew she wasn't scary, or she picked a good spot).

    There are so many genuine ways it can happen. Its just "natural" to meet people that way, because it suggests there is no agenda, since the person isn't giving you the creeps by doing it.

    Its like body language, don't force it. (did you know you can just walk up to a girl, stand infront of her, drop your shoulders, start slowly shaking your head, and say "I just don't know what to do with you", then stop and say "hmmm, can't decide" smile and sit down beside her, its the same thing but just a bit more intense)
    So in a way its a bit like fractionation or an open loop (which again relates to a vacuum).

    Fun stuff x)
    But basically you just have to be believable. I gave you a few examples just to kind of show you what I mean by that.

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